Lean in. Lean out.
The fireweed is turning to cotton, and according to Alaskan folklore, that means summer is coming to an end. I even saw fall leaves yesterday on my walk. It feels way too soon, but that's southeast Alaska for you.
As some of you already know, I've been creating all sorts of new adventures and slowly closing down old ones. I am in a new relationship, applying to graduate schools, preparing to move, and ending my 21-year-long retail career.
Lean in, lean out (slowly), and lean in again.
This has been my pattern, even motto, for the last month.
Closing this chapter and jumping into a new story brings scary hesitations. One minute I'm excited, curious, and leaning in, and the next, I want to run the opposite way at the first hint of resistance.
*Whoa, Cole, slow down.
While these are all natural feelings, running is exhausting, and I refuse to let fear win.
Leaning out slowly allows me to widen my view and question my beliefs and half-baked assumptions about the situation.
What I usually find is that it's all made up. The stories I tell myself are invented, catastrophizing scenarios (and quite imaginative, if I do say so myself), projecting worst-case situations, and giving me an excuse to quit.
Can you relate?
As adults, we tend to do things that have past familiarity.
We date people with the same interests and quirks, sign up for co-ed sports we played in high school, or stay in the same job because it feels safe.
Nothing wrong with that.
However, if you have tried something new and, upon the first sign of resistance, tapped out and never looked back, I invite you to take a moment and question why.
Resistance is part of the process, but letting it win is doing you no favors.
Instead, try leaning out to see the bigger picture.
Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.
Ask yourself:
What assumption am I making that I'm not aware I'm making that gives me what I see in my head?
What might I now invent that I haven't invented that would give me other choices?
What might I be afraid of losing by making changes? What might I gain?
Who would I be, and what would become available without all my worries and concerns?
Just because you can't see your reflection in a new relationship, your skillset in a new job, or your ability to tackle a new sport doesn't mean it's not right for you.
It only means it's new.
Lean in, friend!
P.S. Please don't hesitate to reach out with any questions. You can do that here. I am always happy to connect.
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